Who were you born to be?

lady gaga born this way tatto tattoodo.com

Women’s problem in society is one that we are all facing. It’s just a very specific way of feeling it –  that disconnect. That disconnection from who we really are.

It’s the ‘pretty hurts’ part of society and culture.

Because when we try and be the ‘women’ (or the cardboard cutout) of what we think we ought to be, over what we actually want, we lose contact with ourselves. And that’s when we lose power.

barbie box woman
Barbie’s friend. Source: pinterest.com

As Kyle Cease says: we lose what life is all about when we lose connection with ourselves. When we trade in who we are and our connection to ourselves for an outside ‘reality’ or aim… this can happen with anything for anyone.

But for women, it is more likely to be trying to be ‘pretty’… trying to be attractive, trying to attract a mate – because that’s what society says gives you your worth – not who you are, or what you’ve done, or your achievements.

It’s only us that can say that who we are is what gives us something. That it is everything.

selfie for approval
Selfie. pinterest.com

The point is, that in all this trying to get approval from… someone, from the outside, we lose the inside. And how do we start that journey, of finding out who we are and what we want?

I honestly don’t know.

I believe in just acknowledging the fact that this pressure exists, and even more than that, on some level or another, that we (well, a lot of us!) want to adhere to it, in order to have things perfectly natural and desirable to us, like having a mate or acceptance, or love…

Weirdos having fun. Source: pinterest.com
Weirdos having fun. Source: pinterest.com

Thing is, when we connect to ourselves, to what we want, to the unique and outpouring everlasting and overflowing expression that is us… when we feel full of our souls, those things come naturally. I mean, who doesn’t want to be around someone like that?

Someone simply trying to ‘be pretty’ ends up being 2D. That’s not because they’re now a boring person. It’s because they’re hiding, from themselves and others, who they really are.

And if you fit into that box, if pretty really is you, then go you!

lady gaga giff be strong

I’m just saying, that for the rest of us. For the ‘ugly’ girls by default, the weird ones, who don’t fit into a norm that was never made for us, but for men selling things to women so other men could watch us, and we would hope to get their approval.

I’m just saying. There is more than that.

There is, so much more to us. To our future daughters. To our future sons.

And when you see it – notice it. And applaud it.

beyonce quote
Yoncé.

Because in each person that stands up to be

who they are or stands up against ‘the box’ that we’re meant to fit into, another future girl can find it in her own self- in her own soul – to really question who she wants to be, not in the world – but in her world – her own world.

And to every weirdo out there, fully connected to themselves, I say thank you. You give us the courage to stand up and be who we really are. Because, if she can do it, so can I.

Thanks so much for your support of the site so far, your contributions remind me that writing this really might be making a difference. And that’s the whole point! Thanks so much for your gifts ❤

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How to Love your Peccadillos

armadillo-sunglassesArmadillo. Source: armaraban

How to love your perfect imperfections?

Easy.

First, call them a cute name, like peccadillos, instead of ‘mistakes’. Or call them anything else that sounds like armadillo. That will work, too.

Next,  smile.

Good.

Next, hear the pain that you feel when you think of how you’ve ‘failed’, or how you fall short, listen to yourself with a friends ear. Then say to, ‘oh, that must be hard for you, love.’ Hear yourself. If you feel like it, cry.

Next, remember the things that you like about yourself. Then remember the things you’d like to change, (and often you can!), and love those things, too.

Born this way. Source: The Tube

Feel that. And listen to a great song and dance around like you own your imperfections – own your weirdness!

Repeat after me: I’M A FREAK, AND I LOVE IT!!!

Omg, I think I want that on a t-shirt, don’t you? If there’s enough of a demand, I will make some.

Much love to you, my lovelies.

Peace.

how-to-love-your-peccadillos-hairy-armpits-gaga-for-gagaGaga for gaga. Source: Pinterest

“This is who the F*ck I am.”

Gaga

 

 

Pit pioneers (and reaching pretty)

Glittery armpits… I know. Awesome.

glitter-armpits-women-instagram-12

Here we have it. Armpit lovers of the world unite. In one blog post. For a limited time only. (Ok, no, well, probably for as long as I am writing this blog and still believe in sharing these things).

 

nb I’m not saying anyone has to grow out their armpit hair. This is just me showing some sisters who are rocking a different style.

 

My pit pioneers:

Xiao Meili

xiao2

Xiao set up an armpit hair selfi competition in China. She wanted women to feel they had a choice in what they did with their own bodies’. She wants women to have the option of growing it out long, if they so wish. So that they don’t have to be seen ‘gross’ by anyone else.

She also won the role model award at the 2015 Beijing Media Awards following a 2000 km walk to raise public awareness of sexual assault against women. Cool.

 

Armpits 4 August

armpits-for-august

You know how I was talking about Muffember in my last post?

Well, here’s some women who got there before me. Chloe Marshall and the gang stormed the streets with their protest, as well as growing them out long for a good cause, raising money and awareness of PCOS (Polycystic Ovary Syndrome).

Ben Hopper

9ce3e3bb4e52747fa057eafb279b8282

© Ben Hopper

Ben Hopper is a photographer from London who took some beautiful shots of women with hair. He wants to challenge the ‘brainwashing’ that has been imposed upon society. To the point where what is natural is not what is beautiful. He is hoping that some women will now reconsider what they find to be beautiful or not. And why.

 

Roxie Hunt and Rain Sissel

roxie and rain

Organisers of ‘free your pits’, and fashionistas, Roxie and Rain (cool band name if they ever decide to branch out into music), are encouraging a movement where women’s pits are free to do whatever the hell they want, shaved or haired.

Since her switch to the fuzz, Roxie has felt more empowered and conscious about every single decision she makes each day. She began questioning what was coming from her, and what coming from outside influences. Knowing what she did was her own choice, and no one else’s felt pretty great.

rain

They got a lot of press interest when they got together and dyed Rain’s armpits blue. #freeyourpits

 

Destiny M

6ffea072877aba8c0725ccc068640e75

Destiny M posted a video showing off her newly dyed pits. Since discovering the hashtag #noshavenoshade she was inspired to try out this new trend. She found that dying them was an easier way of being hairy in public.

Destiny expresses the deep idea that, we have a concept of what a woman is right now; it’s what we’ve seen before, it’s what we’ve seen in adverts, it’s what our family and friends have told us a woman is. But that’s not all a woman can be, and can be defined as.

Or anyone for that matter. If we are only defined by our past, how can we be anything new in the future?

Like it.

 

Madonna

rebel_heart____and_armpit__by_anhell2005-d88aocw

Madonna was bullied by boys in her high school for having hairy armpits. She chose to be different. Because she wanted to know, ‘why do I have to do that?’

Now she is proving once more, that you don’t have to do shave, if you don’t want to. Tell Madonna she can’t do something, she’s daim straight gonna do it!

#rebelheart #revolutionoflove

 

… and other famous people

Most famous people don’t give much information about why they shave or don’t, at least, I can’t find it.

But there a few of them out there, showing pit pride.

 

So, there we have it. Many lovers of armpit hair!

glitter trofy

But this post isn’t just about pit love. It’s also about what these brave women and men really are; women’s rights pioneers. People who believe that the pressures put on women by the media are ridiculous, and that we, ourselves, can define what we feel is beautiful.

I’ve had as many images of perfection shoved down my throat as the next person. -So many adverts telling me to loose weight, to be hairless, to be perfect, to have shiny hair, perfect skin, to be sexy. It seems all that matters to the media is that a woman looks pretty, or is shaved, no matter what she does or achieves. And, for a while, I bought it. I tried to be that perfect woman. I tried to reach ‘pretty’. 

And now I’m writing this blog about hair and image, so I can say to myself, and all other women out there: you don’t have to be a slave to someone else’s expectations. Not the media. Not society. Not your friends, family or even your loved ones.

I can feel the difference, now, between me when I was younger, and was trying to fit into this box of perfection, and me now, in which I am reaching out, and finding my own style, irrelevant of what any magazine or tv advert might want to tell me.  I don’t know when, but slowly my aim changed. I gave up on pretty. On perfect.

Now my aim is to have the freedom to do what I want with my body. To choose what I do because it’s my choice, because of empowering reasons, and not shameful ones. To do what feels good, for me.

My sole aim doesn’t have to be attraction anymore, it can be fulfilment. And love.

But, really, wasn’t that always the aim in the first place?

heart penguin

“The beauty of a woman must be seen from in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart, the place where love resides.” Audrey Hepburn

What do you think of these pit pioneers? Let me know in the comments below!

Next post: Rainbow

Pussy pioneers

Warning:

high rise bush

 

So, here’s some people who are in favour of the bush, showing it in all its beauty.

 

Cameron Diaz

In her new body book, Cameron D advises that women embrace their bush.

large

“Consider leaving your vagina fully dressed, ladies. Twenty years from now, you will still want to be presenting it to someone special, and it would be nice to let him or her unwrap it like the gift that it is.”

 


The Black Crowes’
1994 Amorica album cover shocked buyers, and the pubes had to be taken away from the design when put on sale.


amorica

“If you have to stop and go: ‘what is this,’ then you’re not in, you’re not in with us.”

 

Petra Collins

petra

Petra Collins took this pretty picture of bikini bottoms with a blue haze over the top. I love it. Even though it meant, despite her 25K followers, her instgram profile was taken down, I think her anger about it will have gotten her enough exposure back anyway. (no pun intended!)

She also designed the merkin covered models for the American Apparel windows that got so much press. Very impressive.

petra-bikini1

Here’s what she says (love this!) :

“To all the young girls and women, do not let this discourage you, do not let anyone tell you what you should look like, tell you how to be, tell you that you do not own your body. Even if society tries to silence you keep on going, keep moving forward, keep creating revolutionary work, and keep this discourse alive.”

 

Sunil Badami

As Sunil Badami, Guardian reporter says, just as men have beard pride, and movember, (and so have the freedom to grow their own facial hair, and feel free to do that), that women could have muffember, too. Sunil, I’m on board.

sunil

“No decent person would criticise how dark someone’s skin is today. So why it is OK to pass judgment on their body hair, or any aspect of their physical appearance?”

 

Lady Gaga

After this shoot in Candy magazine there was a shock reaction from the tabloids. I think it’s super hot.

ladygaga super cool

“Women wish to be loved not because they are pretty, or good, or well bred, or graceful, or intelligent, but because they are themselves.”

 

Rhiannon Schneiderman

rhiannonschneiderman1 feminist art

“Why is it strange to have long, glorious pubes? Why is it gross for women to have armpit hair or leg hair? Why do any of these things make people uncomfortable? Why is it okay to openly criticize someone else’s body?”

 

Amanda Palmer

Amanda Palmer likes to show off her map of Tasmania.

“Short and sweet and shaped like a triangle.”

Mary Quant

Famously known for sporting a stylish green heart. Also the creator of the mini skirt. That woman rocks.

Mary Quant

“When you choose your fields of labor go where nobody else is willing to go.”

 

So, there you have it! Many bush inspirations!

betty page

“You can be the ripest, juiciest peach in the world, and there’s still going to be someone who doesn’t like peaches.” Betty Page

 

What do you think of these pussy pioneers? Let me know in the comments below 🙂