5 Ways A Male Feminist Makes A Really Good Boyfriend

5 reasons you should go out with a male feminist hairy armpits pinterestFeminist boy. Source: Pinterest

This is another slightly silly post. But it’s true, a lot of women go weak at the knees for a feminist guy (or at least, I do!) and here’s why:

  1. He’s down with consent

A guy who is aware that when he offers a cup of tea, you might not want it at that particular point in time, and is ok with that becomes majorly attractive. Someone who understands what no means and respects it immediately and with little worry becomes someone we want in our corner.

2. He cares about you

If a guy cares about women’s rights and equality, then he cares about you and all women. That’s hot.

3. He is likely to be fair to you

Anyone that is on the side of equality is likely to show those same views within all of his relationships. Because fairness is important to him. Period.

4. He’s perceptive and empathic

A lot of people cannot see when inequality does not exist simply because it isn’t happening to them and they haven’t maybe understood (or they don’t want to) how this can effect any ‘minority’ group. (I say ‘minority’ as there are a few more women (1%) than men in my country today)

5. He will respect you

Anyone who sees women already as equal to men can see the good points about being a woman and respects women. It is those that believe women are ‘less than’ that do not appreciate women’s strengths. Likelihood is he will both appreciate and respect you.

This is not to say that all men (or women!) who proclaim themselves as feminist are perfect. But, if the right guy (or gal) comes along and they genuinely share these views… total bonus, right?!

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So there you have it! What do you think? Let me know in the comments.

In response to… International Women’s Day 2017

hairy armpits blog in response to... international women's day 2017 8 marchWomen’s Day. Source: februarycalendars

This being a feminist website, I thought I’d best talk about the one day a year dedicated to celebrating women!

I usually don’t take much notice of it (which is perhaps ignorant, considering Annie Lennox’s wonderful and inspiring speech about the coming together of women of this day) as I write often about this subject, and I see everyday as a chance to inspire women; I see everyday as women’s day already. But a day to come together as a collective, to empower each other and to remember, that no woman is alone in this struggle for equality can only be a good thing in my book.

hairy armpits blog in response to... international women's day 2017 a lifeA life. Source: isis.aust

This year, sky are dedicating a week’s viewing to women’s achievements, the UN focused upon equality for women in the workplace by 2030, and Michelle Obama made an awesome speech about why young girls need to be educated.

Emma Watson once asked ‘If not me, who? If not now, when?’ and I think this question answers all of the doubts those wondering about why a women’s day is needed. Because it’s one time when all of the issues we are concerned about can be discussed, together. And that is really empowering. Knowing there is a time for your voice to be heard, makes it easier to speak out knowing you will be supported. You were going to say it anyway, but it just makes sense to say it then.

So here’s to another 364.

 

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What do you think? Are you a fan of women’s day? What did you do this year to celebrate? Let me know in the comments!

Inner Violence? Why your inner peace is so important for the planet today

hairy armpitspeace innerInner Buddha. Source: Your Life Your Way

There is a lot of talk of inner peace. And I just realised the real benefit of it.

I had always thought inner peace was all well and good.I like the feeling of peace, who doesn’t? ‘But it doesn’t help the people fighting in Palestine, I would argue. It doesn’t take direct action.’

I understood that we cannot give (much) to others, if we haven’t taken care of ourselves. But that was the most I valued in it. I didn’t see how it connected practically to the outer world. I thought finding ‘inner peace’ was a fluffy idea that didn’t really do anything much.

Yesterday I had a hard time getting starting on my writing work. I’m stuck in a difficult situation where I want my own independence but am too stuck in my ways of wanting to write my novel and change the world to manage to leave my mum’s house.

This whole situation creates a continual inner conflict.

Listening today to a talk about the Dalai Lama, I realised, that the harsh words I have been saying to myself, are actually contributing to violence on the planet- the one thing I do not want! I realised I was inflicting violence upon someone – myself. And that shouldn’t mean the violence is any less needed to resolve.

When I heard Jeremy Gilley (founder of Peace One Day) say that 98% of conflict is not in the war zone; it is in our communities, and we can all become peacemakers on our turf; it opened my eyes to the power we each have. All conflict is connected, and in a culture where conflict thrives (all you need to do is watch an episode of Coronation Street or open a newspaper, or even watch cartoons) , war becomes a much more feasible option.

And why is this important? I am not likely to be violent to others, although the jump from judging myself to judging someone else in a harsh way is not so far. It is most important to be able to be compassionate to myself when I have acted in a ‘not so perfect’ way, because if I can’t have compassion for myself when I am in pain, I will never be able to hear what is going on for anyone else when we are in conflict. If I can’t DEAL with myself and my emotions and can only ever see an enemy image in myself, then I cannot hear what is going on for someone else in another situation. And without that connection, violence wins. It’s that simple.

And as a pacifist, I do not want to contribute to violence. There is enough in this world.

And so the next time I begin chastising myself, I will begin a conversation with my inner educator.

I realise now that it starts with me. It starts with empathy. It starts with inner peace.

Marshall ❤ Source: The Tube

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Ten hot men that are feminists

I was searching for some feminist inspiration, and noticed some guys standing up for women’s rights. And any guy who believes in equality and is #heforshe is instantly more attractive to me.

So, here we go:

  1. Ryan Gosling

ryan-gosling-she-knowsSource: sheknows

2. Matt McGory

matt-quote-on-feminism-matt-mcgorry-39280485-650-455actorSource: fanpop

3. Daniel Radcliffe

daniel-radcliffeSource: imgrum

4. Joseph Gordon-Levitt

hiry-armpits-the-facts-take-part

Source: takepart

5. Patrick Stewart

love-patrick-stuartSource: Pinterest

6. Prince Harry

hairy armpits prince harry.jpegSource: sheknows

7. The Dalai Lama

hairy armpits dalai lama quote best-quotes-about-feminism-from-male-celebs-his-holiness-the-dalai.jpegSource: sheknows

8. John Legend

hairy-armpits-blog-john-legend-pinterestSource: Pinterest

9. Aziz Ansari

feminist-quote-29-picture-quotes-aziz-ansariSource: picture quotes

10. Will Smith

hairy armpits hot men quotes-feminist-male-will-smith.jpgSource: sheknows

11. Jay Baruchel

best-quotes-about-feminism-from-male-celebs-jay-baruchel.jpegSource: sheknows

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For the Naysayers

 

for the naysayers hairy armpits india_gender_justice_equality_women_equal_asia_human_rights_international_aid_opt.jpgEquality? Source: The Borgen Project.

I don’t usually write anything negative on here. I don’t like to give it the space. But this one’s for my sanity.

Whilst researching for this blog, I find many many comments of the same ilk appearing. Below videos that I am often very excited about, I scroll down (I know I shouldn’t!) and find comments that sting. Comments saying things like ‘feminists are selfish’ – ‘they have no idea what they are talking about, their claims are false’.

When a women feels upset because of a perceived inequality, she is told that this perception is wrong, that it does not exist. She has no proof. I decided to find the proof. The response to that recurring question; ‘name one way women are unequal in this society?’:

Here is the Plan International report on girls inequality 2015

Some stats on the gender pay gap

Findings on all sorts of issues by the LSE Commission

The world average of women in government is 22% (2016), things are moving forwards, just pretty slowly.

Some depressing figures from Rape Crisis just about the UK. The number of women the most often mentioned is 1 in 3 will experience sexual or physical violence in their lifetimes. Great.

15 million girls are married underage every year

Can be self-full all year round 😉 Source: The Tube

The ‘these women are selfish’ argument. -If I am selfish for caring about my human rights and equality, then great! I do not advocate the use of names to put anyone down. But I am happy to be as ‘self-full’ as I possibly can. I think having a world in which women are more self-full is a wonderful idea, isn’t it?!

‘She’s weak’. I see fighting for your own human rights, for other women’s human rights, as beautifully brave. When I see people fighting for LGBT rights, or Black rights. Man, isn’t that admirable? All these people across the world caring about their lives, caring for others and saying, no, this will not do, you cannot treat me this way?

‘We don’t need feminism… she’s just acting the victim.’ Please see the facts and figures above!

‘Men have problems, too!’ I don’t see this one so often. And I am most happy to see it. Yes, you do! -Women want to be heard just as much as men – and if we can start a discussion about both gender’s problems, maybe we can all help each other out. -After all isn’t that what equality is all about?

hugs-giphyHugs. Source: giphy

Thanks for letting me get this off my chest. Now maybe when I see one of these comments I will simply be able to breath, remember my life purpose, remember my beating heart and spirit, and move on with love for the person who does not ever need to agree with me.

If you feel moved to give me a gift, I thank you in advance. Let me know when you do if you like, I would love to connect with you! ❤

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In response to… The Women’s Equality Party

in-response-to-the-womens-equality-party-hairy-armpits-blog-weThe Women’s Equality Party. Source: Empowering.Hearst

First of all, how have I not heard of this?!

The idea of women coming together who all believe in the same thing – equality – is an idea I have thought about since the start of my blog. I knew it would be the way forward in terms of having a momentous amount of energy and power behind the idea of equality. Only I had no idea how that would or could happen. Now I know- it’s in the ballot box!

I am very happy to see this and to see that Sandi Toksvig is a key player in supporting the party. I am happy about that because a lot of people already know who she is. And we like her. And we like QI. I am also happy because she is someone I can trust and get behind.

Seeing the leader Sophie Walker, talk about the support they have already had brought me to tears because I could see the passion I have been feeling whilst writing my blog in her speech. It helped me know that I am not alone, not a single voice calling into the empty hollow void of the internet, but can stand united with many women and men who believe that equality for everyone is the best thing for all.

They have so far received a lot of support (65,000 members and supporters), and the reassuring thing is this is just the beginning. Now the party exists, I am confident it will continue to grow, and to help raise the issue of equality.

Already other Politicians are jumping on the bandwagon, realising they might lose voters if they don’t at least show some interest in women’s rights. While their motivation for this may not be purely in the interest of women, and mostly in the interest of their own power, this is encouraging in and of itself.

in-response-to-the-womens-equality-party-hairy-armpits-blog-celebrating-minions-wallpaper-2981Minions. Source: WallpaperMade

What can I say? It’s a great day for feminism, and is something to be celebrated, that this is becoming a mainstream debate. Despite challenges in becoming a female politician, and many name calling commenters on Youtube, these women are standing up for what they believe in and speaking out for women’s rights.

They could be likened to the Martin Luther King or Mahatma Ghandi of this age. Because in the face of it, they are standing tall and beside us, taking a lot of sh*t for what they believe and I support them 100%.

Comedian Jo Brand and Caitlin Moran, author of How to be a Woman, and many other awesome women (and men) support the campaign, and you can, too!

IF you do support them in heart, please support them in pocket too, if you can. I only say this because they only get their funding off of people like you and me. And when political parties win, it is usually those who have spent the most money. So if all women and men who believe in equality can offer a little amount, then in the long run, it could have a hugely positive effect on all our futures. They even offer reduced membership if you’re hard up.

in-response-to-the-womens-equality-party-hairy-armpits-blog-woman-holding-glowing-world-peaceful-patternsWoman holding glowing world. Source: Peaceful patterns

Other things we can do are vote WE on May 5th 2017, go to a local march, support them online and watch this movement spread throughout the world.

It is time for women to inherit the earth, and their slice of the cake.

Sophie Walker’s Leadership Speech. Source: The Tube

How do you feel about this idea, this movement? Excited? Let me know in the comments!

If you feel moved to give me a gift, I thank you in advance. Let me know when you do if you like, I would love to connect with you! ❤

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Alternate words for sl*t

alternative-words-for-slt-the_goddess_inanna_by_pearlwhitecrow-d5twvup

Inanna. Source: PearlWhiteCrow

Hello Goddesses! (And Gods!)

Like I said in my blog post the other day, there are many reasons not to call someone a slut… But what I didn’t do was give you any alternatives.

As we know from dieting, or talking to children, telling someone NOT to do something doesn’t work! We need to know what to do instead. This gives us a direction; a new focus.

So, here are some ideas for what to say instead, so that you can really enjoy talking about yours and others sexuality:

“You’re such a…”

Sexually empowered Goddess

Sexually Liberated Woman

Alternate-Universe Hottie

Sex Goddess

Aphrodite (Goddess of Love)

Venus (“”)

Inanna (Goddess of love and war – queen of heaven)

Magdalene (Goddess – the joining of two equals)

Inamorata (Someone’s female lover – derived from the Italian word amore)

Seductress

Vixen

Bombshell

Siren

Force of nature

Sexy lady

Horizontal Rhumba Marathon Girl

Femme Fatal

Demi-monde

alternative-words-for-slt-hairy-armpits-magdeline-goddess

Magdeline. Source: Meetup

And instead of saying someone has acted in a sl*tty way, we can say:

“You’re so…”

Amorous

Prosexual

Open to new possibilities

Sexually;

Beautiful

Adventurous

Explorative

Experimental

Generous

So, the next time your girl friend comes back from a one night stand, don’t say ‘You sl*t!’ say “Damn girl, you are one sexually amorous horizontal marathon girl!” And then you can revel in the wonderfulness of your sexualities’ and your being.

P.S. You can also check this cool article for alt ways to say ‘the walk of shame’ – my favourite is the ‘stride of pride’.

Got any more you want to add to the list? Let me know in the comments! I’d love to hear them 🙂

If you feel moved to give me a gift, I thank you in advance. Let me know when you do if you like, I would love to connect with you! ❤

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