nb this is a trigger free zone! ❤
This is a different post to most.
I am writing this for the loved ones of those who have PTSD, but mostly, for those WITH PTSD. Because when I reached out on the internet, I found that there were many descriptions of the pain that you can experience, but hardly anything that said, ‘hey, I’m like you, and it’s ok.’
So, I’m here to say to you: hey, I am like you, and it’s ok.
I say this because it can be incredibly lonely to be in a world where most do not understand this pain you are feeling everyday, much as they might want to.
I, personally, have been through unbelievable pain and seen things that I cannot forget or wipe from my eyes right now. I have seen things that mean the pain is lodged in my stomach, affects the way my nervous system works, and the pain stays in my body.
But focusing on the pain does not help anyone. When reading this as a PTSD sufferer I do not want you to think that pain is all you are. That your symptoms define you. This is completely the opposite of reality.
I honour my pain
PTSD hurts. And that’s ok.
I don’t see myself as someone who is mentally ill. Or strange. Or weird. Or that needs solving. I see myself as a human being who has been through some pain, and still feels that pain today, because it was so strong.
If you are feeling this pain, then my guess is that you have felt loss, you have felt love so deeply that it tears you up inside, and you have felt great fear.
And all this says is that you are living; you are alive, and you are human. And even now, even in the aftermath of this terrible pain, you are able to feel moments of wholeness, and safety and completeness.
I am hopeful – healing
Kintsugi – the Japanese art of cherishing the damage made to broken crockery by filling the gaps with gold to make them more beautiful than before.
I trust that I will heal. I don’t know how or when, but I am certain it will happen. You know why? Because it’s the purpose of life. Life always moves forward, never back. It always seeks to serve itself. That is why the shoot pushes up out of the seed and past the dark soil. Because there is no other way.
It may not be easy, but I am sure every single one of us with PTSD will naturally find ways to improve our lives. (And so can those without it, too!)
For healing activities I have a few suggestions, but I am in no way an authority on this matter, as I am still healing, myself. I would suggest – singing, laughing, yoga, getting a dog, going for long walks, running, exercising, dancing, music, anything that means you feel safe, love, cuddles, good food, and, not talking about your trauma unless you feel you are ready and you actually want to.
Those who support me the most in my healing process; respect my pain and help me to avoid my triggers. They alleviate my suffering. They help me feel safer and in control. So, my advice to loved ones of PTSD sufferers would be the old Buddhist philosophy of ‘don’t just do something, be there.‘
This is a different post to most, because I am not educating, I am not encouraging, I am simply saying: I’M HERE. To anyone that wants to feel it. To feel less alone. Because I am here, feeling the same things along with you. Feeling similar struggles and challenges. Getting to healing alongside you. One step at a time.
“Your presence is the most precious gift you can give to another human being.”
Marshall Rosenberg, Founder of NVC
What about you? What is your journey with PTSD? Please be sensitive to all reading with PTSD and avoid triggering descriptions, while expressing your experiences. Thank You in advance for sharing.